Day 30 – Discovering Myself Again

My goodness it has been a LONG time since I’ve posted! I had every intention of popping in before now, but honestly, I wasn’t feeling inspired to write.  And since I’m committed to living from desire (rather than will power or guilt), I decided to wait until the inspiration hit me.

Well, suddenly, out of the blue, today it did!  🙂

I have LOTS to tell you.

First, I’ve been LOVING my “love affair with my life.” It has been splendid.  In my last entry on Day 4 of my 90-day journey, I began a Love Ritual which I’ve done every day since then.  I can’t tell you what a huge difference it has made taking this little time for myself.  I feel beautiful, sensuous, desirable — even fabulous! — And I hadn’t felt really fabulous since before Ella was born.

I am a woman who loves to feel beautiful. It is part of the “experience” I long for in this life.

If you’ve been listening in to the Free 3-call series,  “Discover A WorldChanging Perspective,” you know that my focus lately has been “experience.”  I’ve been focused on the internal experience of being in the physical world.  So, rather than simply focusing on the physical world, I’m playing in the physical world, but staying really grounded and present to how the experience feels inside me.  I’ve been studying how my senses receive the physical world, as well as how my emotional and spiritual world is affected by my senses.

And so while I am loving being beautiful — and the physical world mirror is reflecting it — that’s not specifically where I am focused. I’m focused on the inside.

And it is RICH.

Out of this “love affair with myself,” and this journey of exploring our “experience” of the physical world, I came across a life-changing book called, Breaking Loose From the Money Game.  It has ROCKED my world, and taken me even further along in both of my current inquiries.  Reading it has given me a completely new perspective from which to recall my power, enjoy my life, and perceive my infinite nature.

Puzzle pieces are sliding into place.  Cracks are forming in old, seemingly unbreakable thought systems.  I feel myself utterly changing with every breath.

I’m loving it!

It was from this inspiration that I decided to launch the afore mentioned Free 3-call series,  “Discover A WorldChanging Perspective.” In this series, I am coming from a place of pure bubbling over excitement, and wanting to share.  I literally can’t keep myself from talking about this new perspective.

Out of this 3-call series, I intend to offer people the opportunity to participate in the WorldChanging Breakthrough Workshop (details will launch on October 15th at, scheduled for November 16-17 in New York City.

I have a confession to make. That this is honestly the first time I’m offering a program and completely unattached to whether anyone decides to sign up.  Actually, three people already have, so I guess it’s happening regardless, but I’m very curious and interested in this utter non-attachment to the outcome.  I suppose it’s because I’ve been playing with the idea of disconnecting my life purpose as a mentor and healer, with making money — which, by the way flies in the face of everything I’ve every taught about being a business owner, BUT for right now, it is giving me tremendous freedom and fearlessness in all that I’m doing in both my business and my life.  So that’s pretty cool.

In this case, for the WorldChanging Breakthrough Workshop, all I desire is a hand-full of people willing to explore this new perspective that I keep eluding to.  And since three people are already signed up, I guess my desire is already fulfilled.

There is an underlying message here in the nature of abundance, now isn’t there?

Let’s see… one other thing  I wanted to catch you up on!  I turn 35 on November 4th. (Bring out the streamers and the buttercream icing!)  So I decided, that rather than celebrate solely on the day of my birth, I would celebrate the 30 days leading up to my big day, as well.

How am I celebrating?

Well, as I said, one of the things I’ve been exploring is “experience.” In life, we have all sorts of physical world desire — goals, intentions, wishes, etc.  Through my recent study on “experience,” I believe wholeheartedly that the Infinite Self that is present with us before, during, and after our physical world experience plays an important role in leading our desire.  What do I mean by that?  Well, I mean that your Infinite Self — the part of you that exists well beyond the physical world — wishes for you to have all sorts of amazing and varied experiences.

But unlike our Human Self who likes to see the goal completed, the money in the bank, the ring on your finger, and the crowded room of paid customers; our Infinite Self is using the physical world for one thing, and one thing only… experience.

While we might be interested in the full bank account, our Infinite Self is interested in the often roller-coaster journey of getting there.  Your Infinite Self could care less about the actual bank account, because it lives beyond its experience.

Anyway, for my 35th birthday, I asked myself what both my human self and my Infinite Self wishes for and the answer I received was this:  Supreme Self Care.

Thus, during these 30 days leading up to my 35th birthday, I am taking a series of daily actions in the physical world that allow me to care deeply for my physical, emotional, and spiritual being. However, rather than focusing on the physical world results of my Supreme Self Care program, I am instead really getting inside the experience of how it feels inside me.  I am attempting to experience my self care as my Infinite Self would, rather than soley my Human Self.

My 30-Day Supreme Self Care Birthday Gift to myself includes my daily Love Ritual, daily exercise, daily nutrition program, daily meditation, my weekly Creative Play Day, and my weekly beauty routine.  As I do each of these things, I’m focusing gentle attention on the experience of self-care. — The experience of giving myself a rich and loving gift.

It has been magical.

Additionally, as part of my intention to “have a love affair with my life” over these 90-days, I am continuing to listen weekly to each new module of the Manifestation Mastery Journey eProgram. Last week I listened to the Law of Feeling, which was oh-so-appropriate in helping me deepen my study on “experience.”  And this week, I’m focused on the Law of Attraction.  In this module, one of the exercises given is to look at what you imagine you will be able to do once your 90-day goal/desire is complete.

I invite you to ask yourself the same question:

1.  What is something you long to manifest into your life?

2.  What are ten things you imagine you could do AFTER your goal is complete?

3.  Pick at least one to do right away

Here’s what my list of things I imagine I could do AFTER my goal of having a love affair with my life:

  • Feel inspired to write a book
  • Take a journey to Africa
  • Go to culinary school
  • Give up my business all together, if I wanted to
  • Have the best sex of my life with my husband
  • Discover a deep unexplored interest or desire
  • Start a non-profit organization
  • Fund the nurturance of independent sustainability for a village in Africa and commit to visiting that village with my family every year
  • Climb Mt. Kilimanjaro
  • Win a Nobel Peace Prize
  • Start a school for kids teaching them how to build a solid connection to their inner wisdom, natural desire to help others, and express their infinite brilliance
  • Have lots of energy and enjoy every moment of motherhood

I’m actually looking at taking action with many of the items listed above. I’m planning a trip to Africa and simultaneously, starting to explore the idea of raising money for an impoverished village in Africa.    I realized I’m already having great sex with my husband.  😉  I’ve been taking discovery walks through the bookstore to see what topics jump out at me.   All sorts of things are showing up, but so far, with only luke-warm interest.  Actually one thing that I have been interested in is studying and connecting with “WorldChangers” — people who have made a positive impact on their community or the larger world.  Part of that has been the gentle, curious investigation of people who have won the Nobel Peace Prize.  There are some truly AMAZING people in the world… Actually, maybe that IS my new interest to explore.  I had a momentary thought today that I might host a radio show that interviews WorldChangers… I’d do it for the raw experience of hearing the stories and being in the presence of truly amazing, impact-ful people on the planet.   I’ve also started taking three mornings off per week to connect and be with my Ella Pearl.  I’m finding this to be truly transformative.  By spending time with her first thing in the morning, when I am bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, and inviting the nanny to come later in the day to take care of her during the hours when I am running out of energy, I’m discovering that not only am I experiencing a greater connection with my little Pearl, but also feeling less exhausted all the time.

Anyway…………. this is a pretty big catch up blog post. If you’ve made it this far, you deserve a metal.  😉  Thanks for listening.

Love and light,



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One Response to “Day 30 – Discovering Myself Again”

  1. Suzanne Holman Says:

    Coco, I was so engrossed in reading your inspiring post!

    And I have to say that I am in awe that you are only going to be 35. I have known you for quite a few years and even from the time we first connected I have been impressed with your wisdom…..

    You are amazing and I look forward to reconnecting with you and sharing our dance in life!

    I’m right with you … falling in love with my life…and making the space for lots more playing…

    Much love and hugs from me to you!

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